Is my wife controlling?

Since it is important to your wife that you eat what she cooks and you are basically ignoring her simple request, you are being insensitive. At the same time she is being controlling and overreacting to the situation. Is there some other issue(s) in this equation that you are missing? She could be projecting other problems onto the meal which might explain the severe reaction. But in the end you are both wrong and need to communicate better and consider each others feelings more.